For those of you who may stumble upon my blog:
You may think less of me. You may call me a hypocrite. You may think me a phony. I, who have spoken out against using technology to fashion a "self"; I, who have refused to partake of the technological opportunities given to me by this modern world (still no cell phone, no Facebook); I, who purport to be some spiritual, wholesome environmentalist - here I am indoors, using artificial light to punch out a blog post.
Perhaps you thought I'd write in beautiful, swirling script in an eco-friendly moleskin.
Perhaps you thought I'd write about the world, the soul, the universe.
Perhaps I fooled you into thinking I was some kind of selfless altruist, my mind and heart full of care for others.
And here I am blogging. Blogging about myself, no less. Fooling myself into thinking anyone would care about me writing about myself, no less.
This is a new side of the girl you thought you knew. I'm not strong enough to show this side to the "real world", of course. And there you have my first confession; this is my space to be a coward. This is my space to be broken, to be imperfect, to struggle. This is my space to be FREE. Free of the expectations you've set for me/I've set for myself. This is my space to be self-indulgent. To be adolescent. To have the audacity to believe my silly songs and muddled musings are worth a damn. And the wise woman wisdom to know they're worth everything.
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